far too serious

We are currently working on master plans to place my dad in the worst situation possible when his phone rings.

Ideas?

“three brothers riding the rainbow waves”

“television was so funny”

“rabbit family hopping around”

“princess twins”

“miss sparkle sprinkles the magic”

Photography by Yeondoo Jung.

In sixth grade, when I had a perm and thick glasses, and wore unit belts that coordinated with my best friends belts, I got all excited about further proving my nerdiness, and signed up for band. After a careful diagnosis, I got assigned to play the french horn. Yes, we really do get diagnosed. Have you ever seen someone meet another former band nerd and say, “You were a flute, weren’t you?” And the other person says, “Yes! And you were trombone, right?” We… just know. And if you weren’t in band, I cannot explain this super cult secret. I will die with this knowledge, clutching my band letter jacket.

Did you know I found my band letter jacket this last halloween, and it had eight dollars in it, and I spent it on a couple drinks? I don’t know what my 17-year-old self would have thought of that.

Everyone rented from Brook Mays. If you live in the metroplex, and you were in band or orchestra in the last twenty years, you probably rented there as well. So it was a major shock, when almost two years ago, Brook Mays went bankrupt. I should note here that, now matter how much you may not like a competitor, it’s not a good idea to write mean notes about them. You might just lose 20.7 million dollars.

There’s been all kinds of weirdness in the music business since that time, including people calling me looking for turntable equipment. There’s a hole in the market. Even as another music store has tried to step up and fill this hole, they’re screwing up fantastically.

It’s an interesting time to see all these things unfold, to see companies rise and fall like tides, seeing people get shuffled around from place to place.

And it’s an interesting time to be in the middle of it, finding a place where my knowledge fits, an area where I can continue learning, and a job that keeps me in pretty clothes.

There are some things in motion, things that involve big changes, and it makes my head spin - in an exciting kind of way, though. I really want to get this right, but no one I know uses words like invest, merger, or partnership. If you think you have any knowledge you can send my way, I’d appreciate it. If you are a person who prays, I’d appreciate that as well.

This is one of those months where I won’t be writing much, and I’m really crossing my fingers that it won’t turn into six months where I won’t be writing. I know I’m being a tease, but this is all I can offer right now… so, wish me luck, my dears.

Jeremy received some spam. What are you doing with YOUR spam? Are you appreciating the beauty of your spam?

I planted these last week:

It doesn’t look like much right now, but the website promised “it’s as beautiful as it is versatile,” can “transform a garden,” and “will cure skin cancer.”

Eventually, it’s supposed to look like this:

I had to have them, had to pay an unreasonable amount for them, because they have my name. They even spelled it right.

Quit rolling your eyes, Holly. And you, Lily. BACK. OFF.

Rozie recently acquired some sweet tires, but she has a suspicion her speedometer is off because her tires have a different radius than the factory tires. Rozie now makes comments like “Holy Mother of Pearl, even that Grandma is going 80.” If Rozie is going 70 when her speedometer reads 78, and she’s traveling at 30 when her speedometer reads 33, what math equation could she use to figure out the other set points on her speedometer?

My math teacher warned me about this.

A while back, I learned that the many of the top lipstick brands today use lead. They do so to soften the lipstick, so it goes on smoothly, but, you know what? Lead is a known toxin. Exposure to lead is linked to numerous health and reproductive problems.

I don’t wear lipstick often, but I do like my makeup. I started reading about cosmetic safety and found this information:

“Major loopholes in federal law allow the $50 billion cosmetics industry to put unlimited amounts of chemicals into personal care products with no required testing, no required monitoring of health effects, and inadequate labeling requirements. Neither cosmetic products nor cosmetic ingredients are reviewed or approved by the Food and Drug Administration (FDA) before they are sold to the public. The FDA cannot require companies to do safety testing of their cosmetic products before marketing.”

Also:

“It is perfectly legal and very common for companies to use ingredients that are known or suspected to be carcinogens, mutagens or reproductive toxins in the their products. Consumers buy these products at drug stores, grocery stores, online or in salons, usually without questioning the product’s safety.”

Since there are ineffective laws protecting us from harmful chemicals that may be in our cosmetics, shampoo, soap, moisturizer, perfume, and so on, it is currently our responsibility to protect ourselves. You can find out lots about product safety at SafeCosmetics.org, which is where all these lovely, keep-you-awake-at-night quotes came from. This organization keeps a database of chemicals used in many products - you can take your shampoo bottle and look up every ingredient listed, to get a better understanding of what you’re putting on your head.

If you’re a bit to busy for that, there is a current list of companies who have signed an agreement to manufacture safe cosmetics, but many of the major cosmetic companies have refused to sign. And if you’re TOO BUSY FOR THAT EVEN, I did a bunch of my own nosing around. For a local, somewhat well-known place that offers a large selection of stuff, I’d recommend checking out The Body Shop.

I’m still going to finish up using the stuff I keep in my bathroom, but my next purchases will probably be from here. And I’ll sleep better at night.

Being productive in a real job = bad blogging.

I’ve been meaning to post all week about this study we’re doing on sundays. We just dove into the book of Esther. This book falls into the category of stories I learned as a child, like Noah and the Ark, where you can imagine all the cute, paired up animals and a ginormous boat in a storm, and years and years later you start thinking about the OTHER details. And you realize that’s not a children’s story at all.

This is one of those stories, where you think it’s about a pretty pretty princess (okay, Queen) who saves the Jews, but the whole truth is much more… adult. And it’s a story I think I’m going to enjoy, because it’s not one of those happy clappy bible themes like Jesus = wealth, a perfect life, or your friends having miraculous healings on their deathbeds.

Its one of those stories that asks: What do you do when there are bad choices and worse choices? And that seems more real to me.

So, my friends, if you were ever wanting to see what it’s like at a church, or you think this story sounds interesting, this would be a cool time to visit my local place. I would totally save you a seat.

You can find last week’s lesson here. It doesn’t make sense at first, but everyone PLEASE REMAIN CALM. He’s just in the middle of a prayer.

This was recently brought to my attention, and I must say, Jeremy Thurmond, I had no idea you felt so passionately about this issue.

Photos taken through a strainer. Which one do you prefer?